The Grey Movie Review (Minor Spoilers)

He looks like a badass!

THE MOVIE: CRITIC'S TAKE


When I first saw the trailer I thought this was going to be a sequel to Taken. Then I realized it's just another Liam Neeson, I might be old but I still can kick your ass, type of film. Needless to say I wasn't interested.  Liam and his crew vs a bunch of hungry wolves? LMAO! Whatever. Next! Then I got free tickets and thought awwww what the hell. It couldn't hurt. I missed my first screening of the film but was able to get another crack at it before it opened. It's not the best Liam film but it is entertaining enough to watch in a theater. The trailer doesn't do this story justice.

STORY

I'm not going to give away a lot of spoilers so I'll keep this one short. Liam Neeson's character, Ottway, is hired as a sharpshooter to keep predators away from the refinery workers. He has a tragic past that almost brought him to commit suicide. As he and his workers board a plane home they fall onto some turbulence that turned into a nightmare. Within minutes they land smack in the middle of the coldest weather imaginable, with little food and water. Ottway quickly tries to take charge of the situation but some of his fellow crew men are asking "Who the hell put you in charge?"

I'm Liam fucking Neeson thats who!

After some gritty talk about their personal lives and wether or not god exists things start to get worse. Wolves notice that they are there and the wolves think that they are intruding on their terriortory. This turns out to be the biggest fight of their lives. Not just with the wolves but with the weather, hunger, and themselves. Will anyone survive this mayhem? Only watching the film will give you the answer.

Teach me how to kill super wolves please!!!

ACTING

The acting here wasn't bad at all. There is chemistry with most of the cast that made this film enjoyable. Liam Neeson shows both his sensative side and his take no names attitude. The transition between the two was believable for a film like this. You could feel the tension between them when things started to get real bad. The cast did a better job than what most people would expect. You can feel for some of these characters throughout the film. The actors knocked it out the park for the most part.

I'm never taking a plane again.

SPECIAL EFFECTS

The special effects were decent for this film. The plane crash was surprisingly intense and left me cringing a little. The only complaint I have are the Twilight werewolves. Those wolves were too big to be believable. With the lack of food source in that area how did they grow to be that size? I know you want them to be scary beasts but wolves alone are scary beasts. Just go out in the wild and find one. Let's see if you don't pee your pants if it looks at you and licks it's lips.

What the fuck is that wolf on steriods?

WRITING AND DIRECTING

The film was written by Joe Carnahan and Ian Jeffers. They put together a tight story that had you feeling for the characters. I liked that they give some characters a back story that wasn't always full of grace. The dialog was believable and straight forward. The film was directed by Joe as well and he did a fine job. The movie feels cold and distrubing. I liked his wide shots and how the camera didn't flinch when things got nasty. I can see Joe doing more films in the future.

THE END

It's a good film to see in the theaters. You are getting your money's worth. The film is almost two hours long but I think some of you won't be complaining about that. It's a tough guy movie that is enjoyable and fun to watch. The tension alone is nerve recking. Not a lot of films can pull that off.

OVERALL

STORY 7 out of 10
ACTING 7 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS 6 out of 10
WRITING 8 out of 10
DIRECTING 8 out of 10

OVERALL 7 out of 10 (Worth seeing in the theaters)

UNDERWORLD AWAKENING REVIEW (SPOILERS)

Well at least she's in leather again

THE MOVIE: CRITIC'S TAKE


When I first heard about this film I chuckled. I knew they needed to make another one because that prequel was just vomit worthy. After seeing the trailer I thought that this film was heading back to its roots. I was glad to find out that they did and added a few more things to the mix. This film is the goriest yet and holds no punches. It is a step up from the last two films. The best in the series yet.

STORY

The film begins with a quick reference to the first two films. Selene, played by Kate Beckinsale, is now living in a world where the lycans and vampires are being terminated.  Her and Michael are leaving the city via a boat when the government shows up and blows them all to hell. She is taken to a faculty where they harvested her genes. She is able to break free and escape into the new world. This world is a place not fit for a vampire. Especially a vampire who only knows leather.

I know she looks good in it but really?

She keeps getting visions from another vampire that is linked to her. She believes it's Michael and follows his trails. It turns out that it's not Michael but their hybrid child that was made in the lab. Another vampire named David, played by Theo James, is helping them find their way. He brings them back to his family's lair only for them to be unwelcomed.  There she learns that her lover has been long dead and that the humans have eradicated most of the lycan and vampires. Shortly the lair is attacked by a group of lycan that seems too healthy and big for them to be suffering. Selene immediately knows something is up.

Like this big fucker!

She plans on heading back to where it all began but first she needs more answers. She befriends a detective named Sebastian, played by Michael Early, that knows more than he should. Together they come up with a plan to not only stop the madness but to also rescue her daughter that was taken during the raid. There she finds out why the lycan need her daughter and that Michael isn't dead after all. It ends the way it should have, leaving the viewing with more questions and wanting to see more.

Cold as ice

ACTING


What can I say here? The acting was average at best. Some of the performances were wooden and Kate didn't show much emotion. Even her tears seemed forced and cold. The chemistry wasn't there either. Not one actor connected with each other. It doesn't hurt the film but it does make it feel like I'm watching cut scenes in a video game. With the types of actors involved and their experience I expected more.

I really didn't expect much from you though.

 SPECIAL EFFECTS


The effects here were great. The 3D added nothing to the film but cheap thrills. I was impressed with how the 3D didn't affect the quality of the action scenes. This is where the movie takes off. The action itself is gruesome and entertaining from start to finish. Most of the film is action packed which makes the film seem too short. I liked the death scenes despite how some of them looked fake. This shouldn't bother you too much sense you'll be picking your mouth up from the floor or squinting your eyes due to all the bone breaking and jaw ripping. Yeah they really didn't give a fuck.

Neither did she!!!

P.S.

What was up with the bootleg Michael? They showed his picture but had a stunt double play him? That was just retarded!!!

WRITING AND DIRECTING


The film was written by 4 different writers including Len Wisemen. They put together a good action story but left out character development, emotions, and logic. I couldn't feel for any of the characters including the little girl. Adding ten more minutes of story wouldn't have hurt. It may have made the movie even better. The film was directed by Marlind and Stein. The movie was filmed in dark and gritty settings throughout. You can see the action in full view and nothing seems out of place. They made the film feel cold and wet which added a feeling of despair or disgust. The fight scenes were breathtaking which made Selene an instant badass. That is one vampire that Blade and Buffy would have one hell of a time defeating, that's if they even could.

THE END


The film is a must see. I wish you had an option to opt out of the 3D but it looks like you don't. Not a lot of theaters are showing it in 2D but if you can find one then skip the 3D and save some extra bucks. The film is the best in the series and it's super badass. Who knew that a chick like that could kick some major ass?

They don't stand a chance!

OVERALL


STORY 6 out of 10
ACTING 6 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS 7 out of 10
WRITING 5 out of 10
DIRECTING 8 out of 10


OVERALL 6 out of 10 (WORTH A VIEWING IN 2D ONLY)

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol Review

Bad ass movie

THE MOVIE: CRITIC'S TAKE

After hearing about a fourth film in the Mission Impossible franchise, I wanted to facepalm. Why are they doing this again? Does Tom Cruise need money that bad? This franchise doesn't need another film. The 4th film is like a kill shot for most franchises but this one seemed to differ. Just like Fast and Furious delivered the goods, Mission Impossible 4 does about the same. It's action packed and gives us a few stunts that left our jaws opened. It's a good film to see to end 2011.

STORY

The story picks up in Moscow where Ethan Hunt, played by Tom Cruise, is being held captive. He was imprisoned for going ape shit after his wife was killed. He is enlisted to gather files about an agent code named Cobalt. Hunt and his team is found out by an unknown agent and the building is blown up. Agent Sidirov believes that it is Ethan behind the screwjob but the IMF is able to extract Ethan in time. The russians are calling this attack an act of war and are now planning on taking down it's enemies. The president, out of desperation, activates Ghost Protocol and sends Ethan on a mission with his new team.

Let it rock

The team is able to find out Cobalt's mission to destroy the world. He strongly believes that the only way for humans to evolve is through tragedy after tragedy. He wants to start a nuclear war that should jump start evolution. Yeah this guy is fucking crazy! All he needs is an activation code so he can start rearranging America. Ethan and his team galantly try to get the codes before they are exchanged but fail. It turns out that some people aren't always what they seem.



Like this guy

There is some trouble among Ethan's members because Ethan thinks that Brandt, played by Jeremy Renner, is a double agent. Ethan learns that Brandt was on assignment when Ethan's wife was murdered. He takes blame for Ethan's wife death and hopes to avenge it but helping Ethan. As the story continues some twists and turns emerge that will leave you gasping for air. The story is easy to follow and not to complex. I was pleased with this film and I think you will be too.

I know you love me

ACTING

The acting here is pretty good. Tom Cruise is his usual self; cocky, serious, sarcastic, and looking like he ages like a Highlander immortal. Jeremy Renner was a delight to see and Simon Pegg added the much needed comedy. The chemistry with the team was great to see but I felt the villians needed to be more menacing. For an action movie like this you would expect to have a chill run down your spine whenever they would walk on screen. I felt none but that didn't stop them from trying. Overall the acting is passable and surprisingly enjoyable.

I'm sorry

SPECIAL EFFECTS

The effects here are easy on the eyes. The action scenes are top notch and I could feel the action explode on screen. I was never fond of the face masking but it seemed to pay off in this one. Most of the action scenes are eyepopping and is worth seeing on the big screen. I perfer IMAX. How about you? P.S. You may get a little dizzy when Tom Cruise goes extreme on the worlds tallest building. Just hang on tight and try not to puke.

Hold your vomit!

WRITING AND DIRECTING

The film was written by Josh Appelbaum and Andre Nemac. They did a wonderful job putting together a great script. The movie has a nice pace to it and the action is plentiful. The dialog is fun to hear and they were able to make and introduce some exciting characters. The film was directed by Brad Bird and he surprised everyone. He is able to bring the action close to home and make this film one to remember. Brad Bird has a great future ahead and can't wait to see what he will do next.

THE END

The film is the best in the franchise. That's a hard thing to back up but watch the film and you might agree. It's a fun movie to see before the year ends. You won't be disappointed if you like these type of movies. Tom Cruise is back on top and I think Katie Holmes can finally breathe a little. His ego has been served.

OVERALL

STORY 7 out of 10
ACTING 7 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS 8 out of 10
WRITING 7 out of 10
DIRECTING 8 out of 10

 OVERALL 7 out of 10 (MUST SEE)




 

JACK AND JILL MOVIE REVIEW (MINOR SPOILERS)

Why?

THE MOVIE: THE CRITIC'S TAKE

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! WOW! Adam Sandler must need a payday if he thinks this movie was a good idea. Haven't we seen this about 5 times already? I don't understand why these types of movies are being made. Most of them aren't that funny and just about every comedian makes their way into this field. When I saw it I wasn't expecting much and that's exactly what I got. O and a bunch of silly commercials. Like Really Adam? REALLY!

STORY

Jack is a successful man no matter how you cut it. He has a beautiful wife and family, has a kickass job, and lives in a nice neighborhood. Too bad he is in hot water at his job and it looks like he might get canned. His boss flat out told him if you don't get Al Pacino to do a Dunkin Donuts commercial your career might be terminated. This puts him in a tough situation and doesn't know how to get someone like that to help him. To make matters worse his twin sister, Jill, comes to pay a visit.

His twin sister is well f**cking ugly! She has a great attitude though. Everyone seems to love her but Jack. He finds her annoying and a pain in the ass. Her antics only motivate him to search for good old AL and try to convince him to do the gig. He tells him no until he meets his lovely sister. He falls head over feet for her and she oddly does the same. Jack can't believe his eyes and neither could we.

He uses this to his advantage and tries to get Al to do his bidding. Too bad Jill might be rethinking her decision which gives Jack a scare. Can Jack save his career and keep these two unlikely love birds together? Will Jill ruin Jack's life? This is the part where I say head to the theater to find out but I don't want you to suffer.

ACTING

The acting here wasn't bad. Adam did have chemistry with everyone and Katie and Al made the film tolerable. It's the laughs and antics that was stupid. I think they tried too hard to come off as funny. There's a lot of hit and misses here that the actors couldn't hide it. It's a shame because with all these talented actors this department should have scored higher. It was an overall fail.

SPECIAL EFFECTS

The effects here was pretty decent. Seeing two Adam Sandlers almost made me vomit. The colors are beaming and the scenery is an eye catcher. I love all the different wardrobes and how they got Al Pacino to do his thing in old fashioned clothes. The film would be watchable if the movie wasn't so bad.

WRITING AND DIRECTING

The film was written by Adam and Steve Koren. They put together a lack luster story that flops. The dialog is sloppy and the antics aren't always that funny. At least the director, Dennis Dugan, showed what he could do. The movie is filmed nicely and it seems that he was having fun with the camera. I can see Dennis directing more movies. I just hope Adam isn't a part of it.

THE END

Wait for Netflix. It isn't worth your money. It does have some funny moments but not enough to garner coughing up 10 or more bucks to see this film. Movies like this need to stop because It's a waste of money and time. I just hope Hollywood gets the memo.

OVERALL


STORY - 4 out of 10
ACTING 6 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS 7 out of 10
WRITING - 4 out of 10
DIRECTING 7 out of 10


OVERALL 5 out of 10 (SKIP IT)


VOMIT
Like this scene
WTF
Yuck

11-11-11 Review (Minor Spoilers)

This can't be good

THE MOVIE: CRITIC'S TAKEThis movie was released quietly without a lot of buzz. In order to see this film you literally will have to search high and low to find where this movie is playing. When I saw the trailer I was intrigued by the look of the film and the story itself. This is a low budget film that delivers some decent scares and jumps. It is written and directed by the same director from the saw series. It has enough scares and jumps to satisfy any horror fan. I want to call it a decent film for a late night scare but overall it was a bore.

STORY

Plagued by thoughts of his dying family, a successful author by the name of Joesph, played by Tim Gibbs, is having a hard time writing his next book. His family died in a fire caused by an unknown source. He tries attending support groups to help deal with his lose. It doesn't help and he's still has a lose of faith. He has an annoying friend that tries to put him on the right path but all he does is piss him off. He begins to see signs of 11-11-11 all around him. He doesn't know why he sees them and thinks it's just his imagination. It wasn't until his brother called when things got really crazy.

He has to return home to tend to their dying father. There he learned some dirty secrets from the bible that caused a lot of people from the church to leave. Joe continues to find strange things about the bible and his family. The local residents aren't helping him with his questions and he keeps on seeing occult like signs that are driving him insane. O and did I mention that there is a devilish like creature stalking him!

Once learned that this haunting had something to do with his family's death he has no choice but to find all the answers. It seems something big is coming for him and he begins to take precaution. The question is will it be enough? The scares were decent but I can't say that this was a fun ride. I wanted to get off half way.

ACTING

The acting here was unimpressive. It seemed like no one cared about this film. The chemistry was lacking everywhere the camera turned. After just a few minutes I was freaking bored to death. These actors should be ashamed! ASSHOLES!!!

SPECIAL EFFECTS

The special effects was done well at least. This film is gritty and dark and it helped hide the low budget makeup. The film relied heavily on smoke and mirrors to give you scares. I can only pick out a few scenes where you can tell that this movie needed more money but overall it's nothing to complain about. This was the only good thing about the film.

WRITING AND DIRECTING

The film was written and directed by Darren Lynn Bousman. This was not one of his best films. The dialog is not satisfying and the pace of the film is quite a drag. The directing wasn't better either. It looked like Darren lost his touch and tried to make a Uwe Boll film. I hope he will get his act together because this was a disappointment.

THE END

It's a waste of time. It does have its moments but overall it's not a great film to see in theaters. I wouldn't even buy the DVD. I would wait for cable or Netflix. You aren't missing anything special.

OVERALL


STORY 4 out of 10
ACTING 3 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS 5 out of 10
WRITING - 4 out of 10
DIRECTING 5 out of 10


OVERALL 4 out of 10 (SKIP IT)



This includes you!
I would be scared too
Like this

A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas (Minor Spoilers)

THE STORY: CRITIC'S TAKE

The first two films were food for the retarded and drugged up mind. This film is no different. When I heard about it I thought Oh My God not again. These two goofballs can not be at it again. Adding Christmas to it just made it that much stupider. What I mean by stupider is... it's freaking great!

STORY

It seems as though that Harold and Kumar has drifted apart. Kumar is getting married to a woman named Maria and Harold has become a successful business man. Kumar is able to find santa at his local mall and asks him a bunch of questions. The only real answer santa gave him was found in the blunt that santa made for him. Meanwhile at their old place, Kumar recieves a package. Within that package is the mother of all weed. Harold is impaled to deliver the package personally. This proves to be a huge mistake because Kumar is trying to change his ways and o yeah they manage to burn down Kumar's Christmas tree!

That Christmas tree was given to him by his father-in-law. The father wanted his daughter to have a Christmas that he never had. Harold has no choice but to find a similar tree or the father will kick his ass! Kumar feeling guilty tries to help but only made things worse. This leads to them getting kidnapped, shooting santa, seeing some hot ass, and spending time with their old friend Neil! It was one wild time!

The party had to end though and the quest for the Christmas tree didn't have a happy ending. Kumar now has to face the dreaded father in law and wonder if he has finally ruined his life. Harold has to make a big choice that will lead him to an old flame. Will everything end well with these two weed heads? Go see the film in 3D if you haven't already!

ACTING

The acting here was pretty good. You knew that Kal and John would have great chemistry. Neil was as funny as ever and added a lot to the film. I didn't like the women in this movie though. They just seemed so stall and boring. Thankfully the movie didn't follow suit.

SPECIAL EFFECTS

This film had good action throughout. The 3D was pretty good and eye popping. They did over due the 3D though and a thought some of it wasn't needed. It's about time we saw some X rated 3D in a comedy. That can poke my eyes out any day.

WRITING AND DIRECTING

The film was written by Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg. They did a decent job with the laughs. This movie is over the top but that is what made this film such a success. The film was directed by Todd Strauss-Schulson. He didn't bring anything special to this film. Any director could do what he did and it seems he relied to hard on the 3D to hide his inexperience. The story did flow nicely though and the movie isn't too long. The director must be happy.

THE END

It's a decent film to see when you're high or tipsy. You probably wouldn't enjoy it to it's fullest potential while sober. It's a good late night movie with buddies. You'll have a good time. Just don't forget to light up first before going to see it. With the 3D things will get crazy!

OVERALL

STORY 5 out of 10
ACTING 7 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS 8 out of 10
WRITING 7 out of 10
DIRECTING 5 out of 10

OVERALL 6 out of 10 (GIVE IT A TRY)


He had these guys
As you can see
Film saviors!
Things can't get worse?
O Shit!
Weed Heads Rejoice

TRICK R TREAT REVIEW (MINOR SPOILERS)

It's about damn time!

THE MOVIE: CRITIC'S TAKE

When I first heard about this film it was suppose to come out in 2008. It was pushed back due to Warner Bros being butt hurt over the way they treated the children. I mean all they did was kill some retarded kids and bring them back as zombies. No big deal right? Well anyway this movie fell into limbo for sometime until Legendary finally decided to drop this movie on DVD and Blu Ray. You can guess that I rushed to the dvd store and purchased a copy. I didn't because I actually saw a screening of it but I still bought it anyway. It's a damn good movie to have and one of the best horror films of this generation. If you want to have a good Halloween then watch Trick R Treat. It really is a treat for the eyes.

STORY

You must fellow the rules of Halloween or the ghost of Halloween will come and eat your soul! This movie consists of three different stories that intersect together. The first is of a principal who hates his students. He is having a nice conversation with one of his kids and tells him all about the rules. One of them is never smash a pumpkin. The kid did just that and the principal kills him nasty. He has a son that seems to be pissing him off and it looks like he is about to do him in too. Turns out all he was doing was teaching the kid how to kill.

One big happy family

The other story is about four females looking for dates. One of them is being a little to shy and her sister and friends are trying to egg her on. It seems that they are looking for a little action and the shy one wants to wait for that special someone. They continue looking for dates and eventually finds them. The oldest sister allows her to roam the streets alone to look for a date. It turns out to be a very bad idea because she winds up being stalked by a wannabe vampire! Looks like little red riding hood is in for the fight for her life.

I'm looking for True Blood... got some?

The last story evolves around a bunch of teenagers trying to play a prank on a special needs girl. There is a story about a haunted cliff where a bunch of special needs children were murdered by their own parents. They take the girl and play a very mean joke on her. This joke, however, woke the zombie children. It didn't take long before this prank turned very real. The ghost of Halloween is present for all these stories which makes it even better. Later on he gets in on the fun but I really can't blame him. If you break the rules then you do have to pay!

Pretty isn't he

ACTING

The acting here was great. Everyone had chemistry from beginning to end. I was drawn into this movie from the very beginning because the characters seemed so real. This has to be the best acting for a horror film in a long while. Two thumbs up in this department.

Cheese

SPECIAL EFFECTS

The violence here is a must see. They didn't hold any punches with anyone. The kids get it just the same. The gore isn't over the top and it seemed that they got it just right. The werewolves didn't seem realistic and I was disappointed with the CGI effect. Other than that this department was a success.

O shit

WRITING AND DIRECTING

The film was written and directed by Michael Dougherty. He did a great job in both departments. The story flows nicely on every scene. The twist and turns never stop which makes this movie very exciting. The directing was great as well. He filmed it beautifully in the dark. Everything is crisp and in eyes view. This film is a must see!

THE END

The movie is great! It's the best horror film in years. It should have been released in the theaters but I really can't blame them. No one wants to watch kids get hurt or killed. None the less this film breaks new ground and is quite entertaining. Buy the dvd. It's worth every penny.



OVERALL


STORY - 8 out of 10
ACTING - 9 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS - 7 out of 10
WRITING - 8 out of 10
DIRECTING - 8 out of 10


OVERALL 8 out of 10 (MUST SEE)
 
 
 
 
 

Puss in Boots Review (Minor Spoilers)

It was only a matter of time

THE MOVIE: CRITIC'S TAKE

Well well well. Look what we have here. A movie about an adorable little pussy in boots. This cat was a cool addition to the movie Shrek. He became so popular that the the studio needed to make a movie about him. I was skeptic at first but after catching a sneak peek of this film I had to change my mind. It's a good film that I think the family will love. Maybe even the ladies.

STORY

It begins in one of the most unlikely places. Puss in boots is a young kitten living in an orphanage with Humpty Dumpty, played by Zach Galifianakis. Together they dream of getting out of the orphanage and finding a better life for themselves. Through some wackyness they come up with an idea of stealing some magic beans that will grow into a big tree that will lead them to a golden egg and some riches. Too bad they end up drifting apart and leading two different lives. One goes on to be a saving grace and a heart throb to many felines and the other just well... sits there.

You all know the story

Puss meets his partner in crime named Softpaw, to help him with his adventures. Along one of those adventures he comes across his old buddy Humpty. Humpty still dreams about getting the magic beans and makes up a plan. Puss isn't interested at first but sense softpaw was all for it he decided to give it a shot. One problem though. Jack and Jill has the same idea and is also in pursuit of the magic beans. This turns into one fun adventure that I don't want to spoil for anyone. Take the kids. They will love it!

ACTING

The acting here is pretty damn good. Everyone had chemistry here and it is felt throughout the picture. I enjoyed the interactions with Billy Bob Thornton and Antonio Banderas. They light up the screen when they are together. There is a lot of laughter here and I'm glad the right actors was chosen.

Helpful isn't he?

SPECIAL EFFECTS

The special effects were great. Everything looked sharp and on point. The detail was better than any Shrek movie which really says something. The 3D version is a must see. It pops in the right places and at the right time. They truly out did themselves with this film.

I'm bringing sexy back!

WRITING AND DIRECTING

The film was written by too many screenwriters to mention and directed by Chris Miller. The directing was almost flawless. I loved how he presented and introduced each character. He shot the film as if it wasn't an animated movie and made it into something special. The writing, however, isn't so great. It has it's funny moments but overall it was lacking something. The actors really made the dialog seem intriguing despite how silly it sounded. The movie isn't as slow paced as I thought but it still drags in some areas. Maybe it needed another rewrite.

THE END

Despite its minor flaws it's a good movie to watch with the family. It will blow you away with the special effects and 3D. The action scenes aren't shabby either thanks to Chris Miller. Puss in Boots stands alone as being one of the better stand alone films. I just hope there's no sequel to this. It really doesn't need one.

OVERALL


STORY - 6 out of 10
ACTING - 8 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS - 9 out of 10
WRITING - 5 out of 10
DIRECTING - 8 out of 10


OVERALL 7 out of 10 (MUST SEE)


 

Paranormal Activity 3 Review (Minor Spoilers)

Not this shit again!

THE MOVIE: CRITIC'S TAKE

WHY?!?! Why are they doing another one? Not just another one but an origin story? The first one scared me to the point where I was looking around the house looking for anything strange, let alone sleeping with the lights on. The second one went too Hollywood for me and left me tasteless. I wasn't hoping for anything special other than being scared. Yeah there's a few jumps and scares here but nothing that you will take back home with you. It's better than the last one despite it going back to bull$hit land.

STORY

It begins with the second one. Katie brings her sister a box of old VHS tapes of them when they were little. After looking through the box they realize that they don't remember any of them. During the events of the second one the box magically disappears. We jump to a birthday party in 1988. Everything seems fine and the two little sisters are having a good time. The stepfather introduces himself to his new camera. He uses it for everything it seems. Videotaping his daily work, the kids, his wife smoking pot, and a little fun in the bedroom. Too bad an earthquake happened and they had to flee the room. Good thing the camera was still running because it caught the demon knocking off dust from it's body! It damn sure didn't look human either.

WTF!

This leads the husband to film the room, the children's room, and the kitchen/living room. He learns that Kristi has an imaginary friend named Tobi. He catches her talking to him in the dead of night. He asks her about him and she tells him that he's tall, humanlike, and friendly. Soon weird things start to happen like weird noises coming from through out the house, Katie being locked in the closet with a demon, the babysitter playing hide and go seek, which leads to her boobie being grabbed (you will see what I'm talking about when you see the film), and Katie's pony tail being pulled lifting her off the ground! Despite all of this the mother doesn't believe a single word from anyone. That all changes when see witnesses all of her kitchen appliances including the table fall from the ceiling.

I'm innocent I swear

This leads to her taking them to her Grandma's house. Too bad that Tobi didn't get the memo that he should stay put and follows them. Turns out that Grandma had a plan for them all. I won't give away the ending but it left me wondering "Why was this film even made?" I get that they wanted to continue the saga but the way it's going it's becoming ridiculous. When you run out of good ideas for a trilogy it's time to hang it up. I hope it's not the last piece to this movie puzzel because It shouldn't end like this. Having the girls do that with the demon is just plain disgusting.

Feel my pain

ACTING

The acting here is pretty decent at best. The parents felt like they were truly in love and cared for the children. The two little girls played their part well and it felt like they were truly scared. The girls made the movie believable and that's a hard gig for little children. I doubt many people will complain about this department. They do pull you into the movie which is a very good thing.

I will eat your soul

SPECIAL EFFECTS

I like the special effects. Much better than the last two films. The kitchen scene was a big surprise and a highlight of the movie. The way Tobi played around with the babysitter left the audience in awe. You barely get that reaction with horror films. I see good things in the future for this special effects team.

Sexy

WRITING AND DIRECTING

The directing here was decent. For handheld cameras you get to see everything you need to see. It's the writing I have the problem with. The parents reactions was unrealistic. The stepdad's friend gets clawed in the stomach and witnesses the wrath of Tobi and all he does is leave and tells him to watch the tape? If that was me I would have grabbed the little girl, left the camera, and high tide my ass out of there and never looked back... not clean up the mess Tobi made. The mother was just as stupid. I couldn't help but shake my head.


THE END

Overall the movie is a must see. It's better than the last films when it comes to special effects, acting, and directing. The story, however, wasn't better than the first. It raped away any redemption for this franchise to get better. See it for a good Halloween scare. Then go back to the cashier and ask for a refund. I heard many people in the audience say that on their way out.

OVERALL


STORY - 6 out of 10 (would have been 8 if the ending didn't suck)
ACTING - 7 out of 10
SPECIAL EFFECTS - 8 out of 10
WRITING - 5 out of 10
DIRECTING - 8 out of 10


OVERALL 7 out of 10 (MUST SEE)